When I quit drinking over 2 years ago, I experienced a surge in creativity. The role of art in my recovery has been huge!
The Role of Art in my Life Before I Drank
As a kid, being an artist was a part of my identity. I was proud of my talent and enjoyed honing my skills. Everyone at school knew I was an artist, as my work often stood out among my classmate’s scribbles.
When I was in 4th grade, I competed in a state-wide contest called Art Smart, where students were tested on their knowledge of famous artists throughout history. I made a perfect score on my test and won first place!
It was well-known within my family, that I was the “artistic one.” My grandmother loved it when I sketched portraits of her mom and aunts.
Art as an Emotional Outlet
I was about 11 years old when my parent’s drug and alcohol use spiraled out of control, and psychological abuse became the norm within my family, prompting my art to become more expressive. My agony spilled onto paper like prisoners at recess. Art became a powerful emotional outlet for me.
For years I was unfairly treated like a hot potato by my dysfunctional family, until the final push from the nest at 16 years old. My survival instincts kicked in. Work and school became my top priorities, which, unfortunately, left little space for art in my life.
Self Esteem Through Art
From the ages of 17 through 25 my self-esteem was in critical condition from dealing with the fallout of previous traumas. Art and vanity were shelved as I was forced to focus on work and school.
Around the age of 25 creativity resurfaced in my life in the most beneficial way possible – through photo art.
I began modeling and creating concepts for artistic shoots. I was an idea factory! I was like that kid from the 6th Sense movie, except instead of seeing dead people everywhere, I saw photo shoot locations.
“I see photo shoot locations,” I say in a cryptic whisper.
“Where?” Bruce Willis asks.
“Everywhere!”
My self-esteem flourished through photo art, so much so, that I eventually gained enough confidence to leave my shitty ex-husband!
Alcoholism destroyed my Self-Esteem
Around the age of 32, I moved back to my home state, Texas, where weed is illegal. Having been a pot-head for over a decade, I was psychologically addicted to the Devil’s lettuce. Knowing I had to quit smoking, I allowed myself to default to a legal drug, and I sunk into the depths of alcoholism – something I will always regret.
Alcohol destroyed my self-esteem because it ruined my health, stole my beauty, and choked out all of my hobbies and interests that had once contributed to my identity. Drinking became my only hobby!
When I finally got sober, I realized that drinking had stolen my confidence and I was on a mission to get it back.
One of the ways I was able to rebuild my self-esteem was through art!
The Role of Art in My Recovery
Art has played a tremendous role in my recovery because it:
- Helps restore my sense of identity.
- Helps restore my self-esteem.
- Occupies my time, mind, and hands.
- Helped me forget about my cravings to drink during the first year of recovery when my cravings were strong.
- Gives me a creative outlet.
- Provides a natural high and a healthy addiction, which I talk about in detail in this article I wrote for In the Rooms.
Thanks for Reading!
If you are in recovery and need a healthy addiction that will boost your self-esteem and keep your mind off of cravings, try immersing yourself in art. Maybe it can help you as it helps me!
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