Photo Shoots Boost Confidence: Guest Post By Brandy
If you have never treated yourself to a professional photo shoot, I suggest you book a session with a talented photographer asap! Photo shoots are the perfect way to boost confidence about your looks, especially if you struggle with low self-esteem.
This week’s post is written by an online acquaintance of mine who I’ve admired for years for her beauty, intelligence, outspoken nature, and ambition.
Brandy is a total sweetheart. The kind of woman that speaks words of encouragement and builds other people up! She is currently working on a book called Coffee, Confidence, and Conversations: Stories of Love, Lust, Heartbreak, and Growth. Brandy has dedicated her life to helping others learn confidence boosting techniques.
Seen and Green is so pleased to present Brandy’s Road To Confidence!
The Pressure To Look Perfect
I grew up hating myself, mainly my body. I think many of us women grow up learning to loathe our bodies. As if magazines, movies, models, and actresses didn’t create enough pressure to look perfect, I had my dad.
"Guys Don't Date Fat Girls"
From a young age, he told me I was fat and that if I ever wanted to date, I needed to lose weight, because guys don’t date fat girls. My own father said this to me for a number of years. By the time I was in sixth grade he had given me shame, calorie counters, enrolled me into weight watchers and had created an extremely unhealthy relationship with food and myself.
I spent most of my life believing I was fat, ugly, and unworthy of love. I recall wondering how so many of my friends could say that I was beautiful and pretty. There was an extreme disconnect from their words and my own internal dialogue. A dialogue that was sculpted from my childhood experiences.
My Inner Strength
At the age of 36, I began to find my inner strength. Four years of therapy, and I was beginning to unlearn my negative internal dialogue. I still had a long way to go in order to stop hating my body.
I was newly divorced when I received an invitation to model for a local photographer who was on a journey himself to learn portraiture. I was taken aback by his invitation. “Why on Earth would he want me to be his model?” I still had a hard time seeing myself outside of the narrative that was written from childhood.
I secretly had always wanted to be a model. Perhaps it was because they were always beautiful with perfect bodies, and people always loved them. At least that was my perception. I said “yes,” to the new adventure, unsure of what I was getting myself into.
I will never forget the first photo shoot we did. My children were having really challenging behaviors that day, and I was so overwhelmed leaving my mom to attend to them. I didn’t have any makeup on, which made me feel even more insecure, and I didn’t even really know this guy.
Healing From Hating My Body
I stood in the sunset of this amazingly beautiful wheat field and allowed myself to let go of everything. I smiled, I laughed, I had fun. This was the beginning of healing from hating my body. The first time I saw those photos, I began to fall in love with myself. It was the first time I didn’t despise seeing myself in a photo.
One session turned into many more. I learned to accept the compliments that would come my way from the photos. I learned to stop focusing on the things that I hated, and instead, focused on what I loved about my body. As I continued working through my negative internal dialogue, I learned how to interrupt those negative thoughts and eventually the negative internal dialogue was no longer a part of me.
Of course, it wasn’t just the modeling. It was the inner work I did alongside the modeling. I feel free, beautiful, confident, and secure in who I am. As of now, I’ve been modeling for twelve years. It took me a number of years before I would allow my boudoir photos to be seen, but I recognize the power that I feel allowing myself to be seen.
It’s also a double edged sword, though, as we women are constantly objectified. Women want to be free to be sensual and to embrace their sexual power. But, being bombarded by men who think they can treat us as objects can make our coming to our confidence tricky. At least, it has been for me.
Follow me on Instagram @peersupportbrandy
If You Can Relate...
Opening up about our most vulnerable past experiences takes courage, so I want to thank Brandy for sharing her story! The sad truth is that it’s not that uncommon for young people, especially women, to be brainwashed into thinking that our value is based solely on our looks, and that we just don’t look good enough. My childhood experience was similar to Brandy’s, and like her, I too found a boost in confidence through photo shoots.
If you can relate to our stories, I have a few things to say to you:
1. I’m sorry people can be so cruel!
2. You deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.
3. Consider treating yourself to a photo shoot with a professional, talented, and nice photographer. A great photographer will make you look and feel your best. Seeing beautifully crafted images of yourself could do wonders for your self-esteem and confidence.
Don’t know where to start? Check Seen and Green again soon for tips on how to make your photo shoot the best experience possible.
Thanks for reading!!!