Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence: By Brandy Dawn

There it was – Brandy’s first dick pic. When I read her response to the intrusive, yet common, modern courtship gesture, I couldn’t help but dub Brandy as an “emotional ninja,” a term I invented just for her! Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence, the mind-blowing book by Brandy Dawn, will change the way you think about dating, dialogue, and your sense of self-worth.

I Wish I Had Read Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence Sooner!

If you are like me, you’ve spent decades living in confusion, stuck in a cycle of bad relationships with the wrong people, likely due to codependency issues that originated from childhood. If I had read Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence sooner, (like when I was 12), my life would have been a lot different.

Brandy’s writing is relatable. Her detailed accounts of dating will take you on that familiar rollercoaster ride packed with feelings of infatuation, exhilaration, lust, love, and torturous heartache.

Why is it so difficult to find a compatible partner?

Why do men think and behave differently than women?

Why does love hurt?

In Coffee, Confidence, and Conversations, Brandy answers all of these questions with a multi-faceted approach to introspection, understanding, and healing.

Sneak Peek!

There are so many snippets from Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence that I want to share with you, but I don’t want to give too much away, so I’ll just give you a few sneak peeks.

Sneak Peek on Dick Pics

“There was one time this guy and I were having a very deep connecting conversation when all of a sudden a dick pic showed up. I was confused as to why, all of a sudden, after connecting deeply, he would send me this. I wanted to see if I might possibly get a better understanding of him so I asked, ‘Tell me something that causes you pain.'”

(He replied,) “My dad used to beat me so bad that sometimes I would wake up in the hospital and not know how I got there.”

“This gave me a tiny glimpse as to why a man might send an unsolicited picture. The need to remain surface. The need to feel pleasure because pain feels insurmountable. The need to be disconnected.”

Sneak Peek on Communication and Being Assertive

“Why did I just think he should innately know all of this? Was it because I was so incredibly attuned to the needs of others and had made an assumption that he should just know what I need? Was it because I grew up hearing my mom mutter under her breath frequently how frustrated she was that my dad never helped her out even though she never once directly asked him for help? Yes, this is exactly why I was here at this moment.”

Sneak Peek on the Origins of Dysfunctional Behavior

“What creates this environment and encourages this behavior? Is it shame and blame? Is it patriarchy? Is it a lack of confidence? Is it the inability to express emotion? Is it abuse, neglect, or trauma? If you ask me, it’s all of it, and if we want it to change, we must create an environment conducive to change.”

Sneak Peek on Boundaries & Breaking Free from Codependency

“As someone who’s turned inward to heal and to become aware of my own behaviors, I recognize challenging behaviors are often a cry for help, and most often they are survival strategies from their own unhealed story. The trick is to understand that it’s not my job to heal them, nor is it yours.”

An Interview with the Author of Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence

Who Do You Think Can Benefit from Your Book?

I feel like anyone could relate to my book. I share my stories and experiences with dating, healing, my relationship with myself, and how I learned to overcome self-hate and negative self-talk.

My book isn’t just about me telling all, it’s a strategic look into my life and how all of us can learn to heal, rewire our brains, and gain an understanding that all of us are doing our best. I do my best to create a space for the reader to look into their own life with compassion for themselves.

As a peer support specialist, one of the things I personally did in the field was asking deeper questions that gave others the space to heal from. Our brain wants to answer every single question that comes our way, so when deeper questions are asked, it allows us to dig into our subconscious and understand ourselves more.

What Inspired You to Write Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence?

I’ve always loved to write. It’s one way for me to process my thoughts, feelings and emotions. It gives me the space to critically think and grasp concepts I’ve learned over the years. It gives me a way to teach what I’ve learned through my own experiences. Studies have shown that more often than not when we share our own personal lived experiences, others feel a sense of connection and understanding that they, too, are enough exactly as they are.

I’ve also always loved giving people safe spaces to feel seen, heard, understood, and accepted. I’ve spent over eight years serving my community as a certified peer support specialist. As peer support, we use our lived experiences to connect with others, create mutuality, and hold space.

For many years I have often shared my thoughts and stories on social media and a number of my friends and followers have often said, “You should write a book!” I took this to heart and added it to my list of goals on my message board. Finally, one day, a few years back, I sat down at my computer, like I am at this moment, and I began to write. My desire to help others heal was truly my inspiration.

Anything Else You'd Like to Add? The Microphone is Yours!

My hope is that anyone who picks up my book will see themselves reflected back to them. We are far more alike than we are different. We are wired for connection and so many of us are disconnected. Not only to others but to ourselves. When we learn to turn inward, with compassion, to understand our own behaviors, then we can move forward changing the things we desire to change and heal. Most people are unaware of why they do what they do. Most of the behaviors we do now are often a result of adapting to our environment.

Are you a people pleaser? If so, why? What created that behavior for you as a child? Is that behavior serving you now, or is it making you feel overwhelmed, frustrated, and used? These kinds of questions can assist us with critical thinking and moving forward in life. We function from our subconscious until we bring that subconscious to the conscious.

I hope that my words and my stories create a safe space to begin to heal or to continue healing. Thanks for having me as a guest on your page. I appreciate you so much and I am thankful you are also someone who shares your lived experiences. You are a gem!

Where to Find Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence

You can find Coffee, Conversations, and Confidence on Amazon. Also, be sure to follow Brandy on Instagram and TikTok for daily inspiration!

This post does NOT contain affiliate links. If you buy Brandy’s book I will NOT earn a commission. I just wanted to share this incredible read with you!

Thanks for Reading!

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